Ever heard of the phrase “let us hear it from the horse’s
mouth” why is it important for the horse to say what we can so comfortably say for
him? Some might say it is because “until the lion learns to speak, all the
stories will glorify the hunter.” Others might say…? Answer with a proverb
only.
When it comes to mental health, huge damages have been done
involuntarily by people who felt they understood more about what people with a
lived experience of a mental health problem needed, it wasn’t until when they found
their voices that we experienced a paradigm shift in the way we have treated
mental health. Free certified WHO course
See stories from champions with a lived experience of mental
health problems
Ever since I was young, I have always been described as a happy person,
free spirited and very social. I have always had big dreams and aspirations,
and I would put my all into everything I did and by normal standards I was
quite successful at an early age. My story begins early 2008 when I started
noticing some changes within me. I was extremely irritable, and I would go off
at the slightest provocation, I was always crying for no apparent reason, I had
intense feelings of loneliness and worthlessness which led me to turn to
alcohol. The biggest battle of them all was struggling with suicidal thoughts.
All these symptoms caused me to loath myself as I felt like I was ungrateful
for the things God had blessed me with, and this took me on a downward spiral.
Fast forward to 2015, the
feelings I had been experiencing were at an all-time high. I was now drinking
heavily on a daily and sometimes I would drink alone. I would struggle to go to
the office whether I have a hangover or not. In June of that year, I collapsed
in the office and was rushed to hospital, this begun a very painful chapter in
my life. I was in and out of hospital for about two months as the doctors could
not come up with a diagnosis. After seeing different specialists, I was finally
diagnosed by a neurologist who then referred me to a psychiatrist. The
psychiatrist confirmed that I was suffering from severe depression and anxiety
disorder and he immediately put me on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety drugs.
The diagnosis brought me a lot of relief because the symptoms I had been
experiencing for seven years all made sense. One would imagine things would
immediately get better, however they took a turn for the worst. I had to move
back home to my parent’s place, I was not able to go back to work for about
nine months and all I did was lock myself up in my bedroom with curtains drawn,
constantly crying and sleeping.
In early 2016, I decided to go back to work but it was such
a huge struggle since I was not fully recovered. I decided to quit my job and
start a business which only lasted one and a half years and I had to close it
down. I could not bear the pain of the two losses and this pushed me to the
brink of almost taking my life. One lonely night as I was planning my suicide,
I thought about the pain I had been through and realized that God would not
take me through all that for nothing. That was in October 2018 when I decided I
shall use my pain to help others. Through my pain, I have come to discover my
purpose and my hope is that one day through my work of sharing my story,
creating awareness using social media platforms i.e. Facebook, Instagram and
YouTube, giving talks at different forums and giving peer to peer counselling
we will eventually have a stigma free society.
No comments:
Post a Comment